Doritos Creator Dies
The SNACK GOD who invented DORITOS has passed away ... but  his funeral is nacho average ceremony ... 'cause the guy will be buried with 3 FLAVORS of his prized invention. Arch West -- the 97-year-old ex-Frito-Lay legend -- died last week, and his daughter announced the family plans on "tossing Doritos chips in before they put the dirt over the urn" when he is buried. West's son-in-law ... says the family will use Original, Cool Ranch and Nacho flavored Doritos, since those were West's favorite. He was NOT a fan of the Cheeseburger flavor, so those will not be used. According to his daughter, West came up with the idea for Doritos during a family vacation to San Diego ... when he discovered a snack shack selling fried tortilla chips in 1961.


Red Sox John Lackey Files for Divorce from Wife Fighting Cancer
Boston Red Sox pitcher John Lackey has filed to divorce his wife, Krista ... who is in the middle of battling breast cancer. Lackey filed on August 30, according to court docs in Texas, claiming "the marriage has become insupportable because of discord or conflict of personalities." Krista and John got married in November, 2008. Krista underwent a double mastectomy back in March and underwent chemo as recently as June. The divorce petition says John and Krista had a prenup. It also says Lackey has "separate property" he wants to keep for himself. It's unclear why Lackey -- who's struggled on the field all season long -- didn't wait til the off-season, about a month from now, to start divorce proceedings.



Rapper Petey Pablo Sentenced in Stolen Gun Case
Rapper Petey Pablo has been sentenced to spend 35 months in federal prison after trying to take a loaded, stolen handgun through a NC airport last year. Pablo -- famous for hits like "Freak-A-Leek" and "Raise Up" -- had pleaded guilty to possessing a stolen firearm in a North Carolina courtroom. Officials found the loaded weapon in Pablo's bag when it went through an X-ray machine at the security checkpoint. An investigation revealed the gun was stolen in a home burglary in Gardena, CA back in 2005. No word on when Pablo is set to begin his sentence.

Fred Armisen and Abby Elliott Split

Saturday Night Live stars Fred Armisen and Abby Elliott have broken up, a source confirmed. "He was away all summer filming in Portland, she was on location somewhere else," says the source. "They spent a lot of time apart, and they started to grow apart." Elliott, 24, and Armisen, 44, began dating last year, after Armisen split from ex-wife, Mad Men star Elisabeth Moss.
 Former backup dancer and rapper Kevin Federline and girlfriend Victoria Prince are the proud new parents of 6-week-old daughter Jordan Kay, and the happy couple showed off their little one during an evening beach trip recently. Federline's other four children – sons Jayden, 5, and Preston, 6, with ex-wife Britney Spears, and son Kaleb, 6, and daughter Kori, 8, with ex-girlfriend Shar Jackson – weren't along for the fun, though they did take their own trip to the shore shortly before welcoming their new baby sister in August.



Chace Crawford's Marijuana Case Dismissed
Chace Crawford just won a big victory in a small Texas town, after a judge dismissed his marijuana possession case. Chace was arrested in June, 2010 in Plano, Texas, after cops found an unlit joint in a car in which he was a passenger.Chace cut a deal with prosecutors, in which the charge would be dismissed if he stayed clean for one year and performed community service. We've learned the judge just dismissed the case, after Chace's lawyer presented evidence his client performed 80 hours of community service in Texas, working in a hospital and a church.



Lauryn Hill Sued for Stealing Clothes
A fashion consultant who fitted Lauryn Hill with clothes for her European tour back in 2007 is suing the singer, claiming Lauryn jacked her threads.  According to a lawsuit filed in L.A. County Superior Court, Via Davia Vintage provided Hill "with an entire wardrobe of high fashion items." The company claims Hill agreed to pay a fixed weekly fee for 4 weeks. But according to the lawsuit, Hill hung on to the clothes for three months, paying only a fraction of what she owed.. And to top it off ... the consultant claims Hill only returned about 30% of the items, keeping the expensive stuff.
 An Irish farmer who had given Rihanna permission to use his grain field to film her new music video shut down the production on Monday and chastised the pop singer for her "inappropriate" wardrobe. Rihanna, 23, was dancing in a red handkerchief bikini when Alan Graham, 61, noticed her and drove over in his tractor to put a stop to things. "I have an ethos and I felt it was inappropriate," Graham told the BBC. "I requested them to stop and they did."



Cops Called to Jamie Kennedy's Home
LAPD officers rolled to Jamie Kennedy's L.A. area home early this morning -- after the actor and his girlfriend allegedly got into a shouting match that was so loud ... it woke the neighbors. Someone in the neighborhood called police around 3 AM, after hearing yelling and screaming from inside the actor's house. When cops arrived to the scene, we're told Jamie and a female were arguing in the middle of the street -- so cops broke it up. After talking to both parties, cops decided Jamie had not committed a crime -- but the girl was eventually arrested for being drunk in public.
 Famously bald "Seinfeld" star Jason Alexander, 52, showed up to the 27th Annual CSA Artios Awards in Beverly Hills on Monday with a full head of hair. "I am experimenting with some interesting hair systems," Alexander told his Twitter followers on July 21. "Don't be shocked if you suddenly see pics of me with more hair than usual."
 Actress Ali Larter and 9-month old son Theodore.



TV NEWS
Andy Rooney will announce Sunday that he is leaving CBS' 60 Minutes, CBSnews.com reports. Rooney, 92, will deliver the news during his regular original essay feature -- his 1097th essay for the program. 60 Minutes will also pay tribute with a segment looking back at his career. Rooney, an Emmy-winning writer, has been a staple on 60 Minutes since 1978, though he appeared several times in the years before, including the first season in 1968.



The Prospect Park media company on Tuesday announced a name and tentative launch date for the online network that will host new epsiodes of ABC’s axed All My Children and One Life to Live. The Online Network (aka TOLN), as it will be called, is expected to launch in January 2012 — just as OLTL airs its final ABC episode.



The wily Chicago mayor played by Kelsey Grammer has received Starz’s vote — of confidence. Starz has renewed Grammer’s new drama Boss for a second cycle, ahead of it’s Oct. 21 series premiere. Boss stars the Frasier alum as Tom Kane, a cutthroat Chicago mayor who is protecting dark secret that, if revealed, could ultimately destroy his career.



The Game is getting a little Sister, Sister action this season when Tamera Mowry joins her twin sister Tia on the BET series. "They've been trying to find a way to bring her on organically and the way [she guest-stars], it's hysterical."



Jimmy Buffett: Pilot in a tropical climate? Yeah, we’ll buy that. The singer/songwriter/avid aviator will guest star in an upcoming episode of Hawaii Five-0. Buffett will play a veteran pilot who’s a pal of Lt. Commander Joe White (Terry O’Quinn), and he helps Five-0 rescue one of its own from a sticky situation.



Patti Stanger appeared on Bravo's "Watch What Happens Live" -- when she said gay men are incapable of monogamy ... adding, "There is no curbing gay men ... I have tried." But gay men weren't the only target of Patti's unprompted criticism -- she also generalized, "Jewish men lie." Bravo is also apologizing for Patti's outburst -- telling us, “[Patti's] comments are not representative of the network’s beliefs and opinions.  We apologize for the offense it caused.”